Linkin Park. Minutes to Midnight. Given Up

Waking to sweat again
Another day's been laid to waste
In my disgrace
Stuck in my head again
Feels like I'll never leave this place
There's no escape

I'm my own worst enemy

I've given up...
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say?
Take this all away
I'm suffocating!
Tell me what the fuck is
Wrong with me!

I don't know what to take
Thought I was focused but I'm scared
I'm not prepared
I hyperventalate.
Looking for hope somehow somewhere
And noone cares

I'm my own worst enemy

I've given up...
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say?
Take this all away
I'm suffocating!
Tell me what the fuck is
Wrong with me!

GOD!

Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my...
Put me out of my fucking misery!

I've given up...
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say?
Take this all away
I'm suffocating!
Tell me what the fuck is
Wrong with me!

Linkin Park. Minutes to Midnight. In Pieces

Telling me to go,
But hands beg me to stay.
Your lips say that you love,
Your eyes say that you hate.

There's truth in your lies,
Doubt in your faith.
What you build you lay to waste.
There's truth in your lies,
Doubt in your faith.
All I've got's what you didn't take.

So I, I won't be the one,
Be the one to leave this,
In pieces.
And you, you will be alone,
Alone with all your secrets,
And regrets.
Don't lie.

You promise me the sky,
Then toss me like a stone.

You wrap me in your arms,
And chill me to the bone.

There's truth in your lies,
Doubt in your faith.
All I've got's what you didn't take.

So I, I won't be the one,
Be the one to leave this,
In pieces.
And you, you will be alone,
Alone with all your secrets,
And regrets.
Don't lie.

So I, I won't be the one,
Be the one to leave this,
In pieces.
And you, you will be alone,
Alone with all your secrets,
And regrets.
Don't lie.

Why We Pray

Many incidents remind me of why I should pray; human beings will always let you down, it’s practically our nature. Is it because of my high standards? Maybe, but I don’t see why I would have it any other way. Unfortunately the let downs have been happening all too often lately. Might as well, it’s the end of an era and it’s time to move on to a new phase in life. Regardless of how lonely you are however, God is listening. You should try sending Him a prayer … He misses you. Besides, He’s the only one who will consistently be there for you. What have you got to lose?

On Birthdays with "Friends"

There is a feeling of joyousness when friends celebrate your birthday. The huge surprise parties thrown in your honour and the presents you’ll receive with money pooled together by friends to buy you something you’ve longed. But what’s the point?

First of all, a “birthday” is nothing special. It’s just another reminder that you’re getting older. But everyone grows older everyday; it’s just the linear progression of life. Your birth date can be special because it was your first day in this world. But, what’s the fascination with the one year mark; we can celebrate a birthday everyday, every week and every month. Is it an excuse for friends to have a good time? Well, if one is really a friend, there’s no need to celebrate any particular day(s). Every day should be of equal worth, and your friends’ care should not increase as a result of your birthday. It need not be an occasion to demonstrate how much one cares if one were really a friend. It is preferable to celebrate with people who have cared for you consistently. And it would not matter if one did not celebrate your birthday because they have remained consistently faithful and that is worth more than any present.

As such, the huge surprise parties and all the presents are meaningless if you celebrate with the same meaningless people on the same meaningless day.

On the Cycle of Life: Explaining Axiom I

This statement was written in order for me to establish some sort of self-confidence, or self-control over life's situations. Why am I always right, you ask? Well you’re right too, and I’m right.. everyone’s right. Why is that and how does it work?

We tend to interpret things the way we see it, with the information available to us and the circumstances we face. In retrospect, I’m probably wrong, you’re probably wrong, and everyone is probably wrong. But “hindsight is 20/20”; you can’t possibly convince me that when faced with the EXACT same circumstances and the EXACT same information available to you that you would have acted differently. One thing I used to say a lot: “after all, we’re only human.” We are expected to make mistakes, whether we correct these mistakes will be addressed later on. Nevertheless, it is important to establish control. Better yet, consider it as an encouragement to continue on; a statement that would push you to further investigate your reason for making such a radical statement.

I apologise..

I was writing a new entry for my MSN space when I was suddenly reminded of my many abandoned blog sites. In my search, I have managed to recover this one.. one of my favourites. (To be fair, I had one that encompassed everything I wrote during my high school years. There were a lot of lost ideas, but fear not, for these ideas will be in me eternally.)

I want to apologise to myself for allowing things to slip away; for leaving the pessimistic antagonist in a state of hiatus. After reading many of my previous blog entries, I feel as though I need to revert to my cynical side because after all, I owe my life to him. He got me through high school when I was abandoned and protected me when all was lost. He helped me develop wisdom beyond my years and revealed to me my flaws. For that I am forever grateful.

As a result, I announce my triumphant return; if not for the few who care, then for me because I need me more than ever.

On goals...

A liberal arts education is very useful in that it gives you the time to beat spider solitare during lectures. My goal is to beat the most difficult level by graduation. If I don't succeed, I will at least have the rest of my life to accomplish this goal at my cubical.

On Free Speech

Hypothetical:
A man (hereafter known as 'A') walks by a homeless man, he says "Can you spare some change?" A points at him with my finger at him and reply, "YOU! Get a !@#$ing Job" and walks away. The homeless man pulled out a knife out from his pocket, walks up to A and stabbed him. The homeless man then took his wallet and stabbed him twice more times, to make a statement.

Bottomline:
Social Constraints limit free speech, and there's really no avoiding it. Because the homeless man took A's free speech and "he dead.'"